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Golden Saturday: Cal wins; UCLA, USC, Stanford lose on same weekend for first time since 2000

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Jupiter completed an orbit between those two days.

Victor Decolongon

The last time Cal won and UCLA, USC and Stanford lost on the same day, the Holmoecaust was still in full swing.

Note: This post is meant in good fun. We are not trying to offend everyone. But we do have to remark on one of the best college football Saturdays in Cal history before we let it pass on into the sunset.

Below is the meltdown from each fanbase. Enjoy!

Notre Dame 17, Stanford 14 (enjoy the substitution of some four-letter words)

What has changed? Where is the discipline?

third false start.

What the hell?

A first down!

I have a sinking feeling this will be a looooooooooong afternoon.

Just dumb dumb dumb playcalling. Maybe Andrew Luck can make those throws in weather. Hogan quite obviously can't. Bloomgren better get out his "Playcalling for Dummies" book.

Well THIS is bullpuckey. the University of Dead Fake Girlfriends's friends came to play.

Okay no more deep passes in this weather

Drinking game

False start or holding by O-line = shot

Wildcat = shot

Missed FG = shot

Mention that BJS is son of Barry Sanders, or referring to him as "Barry Jr." = shot.

Die of alcohol poisoning.

Catholic ref going to mass on Sat eve

I thought last week was hard to watch.

NDame using a 9.5 yard chain...

The Pope specially blessed that chain

copulate. Garbage.

Our kicking game……the saga continues

Regardless who wins both teams are stinking up the place.

This offense is hard to watch sometimes…

This offense is usually hard to watch sometimes

That's what happens when Hogan tries to look at multiple receivers, lol

Having to watch the Stepfan 4th down multiple times is annoying.

These drops have killed us. Five so far, all of them significant and most of them drive killing. Catch the ball!

Where's the flag? Oh right it's Notre Dame

Guess the game is fixed again when the ball hits the turf and bounces,yet is ruled a catch.

OMFG...must be seven catholic refs.

Come the copulate on!!!!! copulate FAJSOJAS:JASG:LJAGS:

BS call after BS call

Fornicate!

10-7.  Final score.  Refs won't allow any more Stanford scoring.

ND has been called for one penalty, stanford has been called for eight

ND OL are holding, holding, HOLDING

YESSSSSSSSS

This offense finally puts out instead of giving us blue balls

All right defense, it's on you now. Stop them.

Just when you think we have hope... Williamson f***ks up!

What? Actually make things EASIER for our defense? Of course not! We hate them, remember?

Man I hate the prevent defense.

Lyons, for fuck's sake, TURN AROUND.

How do leave him wide open?????

Three rushers?  REALLY?

Yeah but if we had 5 rushers, he gets trapped in the pocket and sacked. How much time did he have. For a QB like Golson, just blitz the copulate out him.

HOW can he be that open ? #18 could have called for a fair catch !

Oh, so that's an intentional grounding huh refs?

What a bunch of crooked evil perpetrators.
This game was fixed and there is nothing that can convince me it wasn't. I hope we break up the rivalry with the Fighting Hunchbacks and never play them again.
I am angry, sad and confused.
Lennay must be turning in her grave
hahaha this game has almost sent me to mine.

Arizona State 38, USC 34

We need a special teams coach

That ref will be fired at the end of the game for assisting USC.

wow. there was nobody within 15 yards of that guy. What a blown coverage

Look the ball in first, then run. chew your food, then swallow

That's rodger's second drop. CATCH the DAMN BALL.

A drop for you, a drop for you, a drop for you

positive yards on a run play drink!

It's like a beautiful unicorn

He can catch Hail Marys, but not easy ones.

"Dead last in the pac12 in explosive plays"...and we have loads of talented athletes

Burned, like a piece of toast.

so we could have kicked a FG and gotten the lead, but turn the ball over and immediately give up a long TD along with a 2 point conversion? yeah, I guess that sounds about right

can we leave sark on the bus ?  Haden would never give up his precious


Does anyone have some NoDoz? We are sleep walking out there.

Which Pete Carroll assistants have we not let be head coach yet?

This team is all kinds of stupid.

This offense is enough to give you indigestion. Such a waste.
HOLY CRAP....IS THERE ANYONE ON OUR OFFENSE WHO CAN CATCH A PASS? ANYONE?
well folks, the good news is, we have new helmets coming. That should help...could be a difference maker!
We shouldn't have to scrape and claw for points
Tired of seeing them jump around on sidelines. It's contrived. When they did it under Pete it was because they were in the process of stringing dominant seasons together one after another.
Sark interview summary : too much passionAnd we just did
WAVE THOSE TOWELS HARDER, BOYS
We need scholarship players. Our sideline looks like a Castro District parade.
"entertaining game": I am not entertained
that might have been the most poorly designed and executed play that I've seen
Why are we in a dog fight with this crappy team?
this QB is just picking apart our defense. We look like pee wee leaguers defending against this guy

So we get big plays and then call a bunch of dumb plays and stall

ASU D is gassed

dont worry we will do something dumb
And we just did
I miss Clancy Pendergast.
Oh, man... We're SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Washington-ish...
BUCK ALLEN! There's your explosive play!
Boom daddy.

That's the game.

Nice little juke there by Buck.
Left too much time on the clock!

FAWK!!!!!!

it's not over, but it should have been.
1 job, don't let the receiver get behind you.
it's not over, but it should have been.
Wilcox is a D genius -- he does not need 2 deep safetys

god this is agonizing

This team is about taking years from my life.

This staff is about taking years from my life.

Three straight runs will burn 2:00.

That will still give them about 30 seconds... more than enough for a scoring drive against this D

So, we pull another guy to help cover the pass, and they still complete a wide open pass over the middle. Unreal.


Setting up to be a gut-wrenching loss. Please no


KNOCK the BALL DOWN.

Why are we only rushing three?

Unreal
Unbelievable
Now I've seen everything
Someone needs to be fired
jesus what the hell was the secondary trying to do
Pullard tried to catch it instead of knocking it down
what was pullard expecting to do, catch it and run 100 yards?????????
A captain 5th year senior shouldn't be stupid enough to not knock the ball down there.
Fitting end
The lord giving and the lord taketh away we got it last week now we really get it this week
I can't believe I just watched that

sark is garbage he will coach us for 4 more year


Nothing better than receiving shit talking text messages from bruin family members.
we dont need the NCAA we sanction ourselves by hiring incompetents like Kiffin and Sark

Pendergast is still being paid by SC. Any chance we can reactivate his employment?

I have been a long time USC fan, but this crap SUCKS. I am done with this BS. Good luck to you all that go through this BS for the rest of the year. I am not, BYE

Sark is the problem. We're so Washington now.

We just lost a game where we had a 2 score lead, the ball and under 3 minutes to go

I am speechless. Worst display of stupidity in all my years of watching USC football

Orgeron is laughing his ass off! Thanks Pat

Lucky for us Sark interviewed well!

The question is....will we go hard for Yogi Roth or Nick Holt? I'm thinking Holt had some great defenses up there at UDUB, but Yogi got the practice balls all pumped up for practices during the PC era......so at this point, it's a toss up.
I love SC but I cannot take the way they are playing. What kind of a coach make the teams jump up and down when the game sucks. They look stupid out there and you could tell it was all an act. Come on guys get coach "o" back that was a stupid move made to hire him.
I didn't think it was appropriate for the band to play "Tusk" in its post-game concert. This joyful and triumphant tune rings hollow after a defeat. Before tonight, I have never heard them play it after a loss or even when the team is behind on the score board, and in my opinion, we should keep it that way.
No! They should play I'm a loser, I'm a loser by the beatles





Utah 30, UCLA 28

OL getting destroyed early
UTAH came to play
why is the offense so horrible in the first half every game
That was as bad a decision as it gets
WHY DO THEY KEEP DOING THE FUCKING SCREEN
OKAY WAKE THE F UP OL--TIME TO IMPOSE YOUR WILL!
By the way. Our offense looks terrible. The line collapses and we can't throw slants. We do no play action or roll outs.
we always suck early. i'm use to it by now
Hundley setting sack records....
If you have an NFL QB, you should probably let him throw it more than 5 yards on occasion.
Can't get excited about sc getting beat when we play like shit
its like we have to spot the other team 10 points before we start playing
Wow, just wow
Throwing into double coverage…and he still gets it.
2005. This team sucks. A few big plays last week but nothing ever looks good for ucla. Ucla probably wins this game but gets exposed later on…. Or maybe tonight. The o-line is so shitty I don’t know where to begin
I'm going to bed.
We need to wake the **** up!
Sack #4
one minute later: Sack 5
throw it away! he looks so hesitant wight he ball
the playcalling is just ridiculous Where are the quick hits?
What if I told you we suck ass?
##$#^@$%^$@%#$@!@#$!^@#%$ why do we make back up QB’s look good
Wow, they are kicking our #%&
UCLA, FIGHT FIGHT, FIGHT!
And preferably you don't have to get a sack, penalty, then allow a less talented team to lead ... before you fight
(This was brought back)
Aaaargh!!!! Adams rocks, but our guys give illegal blocks
That's a 60 yard penalty.
Have we tried a series where we leave the sack out? It might work.
I hate this offense so much. I’ll never not love UCLA. But the N-Zone hurts my head as a person who understands football.
The same running play. Every. Single. Time.
like every week, we make opposing QB look like Heisman contender
ok so many missed tackles
We may not win another game
We can't run for $%#@ Just run it up the middle again sam
why am i awake for this crap
Well-deserve boos
Mazzone needs to go to Offensive Coordinator School. So predictable!
WHO THE F IS CALLING THE SAME DAMN RUN UP THE MIDDLE???? Is it Mazzone or Mora? We dont have OLine why are they keep running middle? I am not even an amaeteur coach and even I see the damn obvious play calling. This makes me sick.
Well-deserve boos
I'm just laughing at this point.
People are already heading for the exits. This is the worst offensive play I’ve seen all year.
Hundley taking the sack.... we are fucked
why couldn't we do that earlier?
Sheesh. I was nodding off.
Ucla wins on late td. All will be good. No need to address any issues. Team is perfect….
Three sacks in a row
That's the most embarrassing series I have ever seen
are you kidding, he's just waiting for the sack
I really don't know what mazzone is trying to do with the offense
Yea dumb play calling and no awareness
We're going to lose this game.
TEn FUCKIN SACKS
Utah's new offense: Punt, sack, sack, sack, move up 40 yards.
hundleys awareness rating in madden next yr: 15
Does mazzone know what a roll out is?
wow this team will be the death of me
Too much time to get excited about a W
Can we keep them out of field goal range!
what d?
You know they are running it and still can't stop it.
That's gonna do it. Bad time for the defense to fall apart. What a waste of a season.
Jesus
killer
This game is taking years off my life. Not the way I wanted to spend my birthday
Just marched it down our throats. Pathetic defensive effort. Just let them score noe.
34 seconds to go 70 yards
Run the 2:00 O in 24 seconds!
55 yard attempt have to attempt it
Not what we would have written up
Roughing kicker?
not close
FLAG!
Roughing???
That was roughing.
Oscar goes to Kaimi!
Thanks Mora
This was a bullshit team with bullshit coaches and a bullshit ranking. I don’t have to watch this crap anymore
not only has Mora not won a big game, now he loses a game he shouldn't each season
all they did was run the ball...wonder what stanford is going to do
I have one word for you: Pathetic, embarrassing, and disconsolate.
I was seriously thinking of spending $85 and going next week.. Think I'll go golf instead
Every Bruin fan’s schedule has now opened up for the rest of the school year after yet another spoiled season. I guess UCLA baseball is the only possible hope now?
10 sacks in the SEC would have everyone associated with the school calling for heads to roll… fans, faculty, boosters, local radio personalities. Anyone im leaving out? It is absolutely not acceptable.
i put this game squarely on Mazzone. His play calling killed us tonight. As a result, when Mazzone was walking back to the locker room, I screamed with all might, "Mazzone! Mazzone! You suck! Try calling something other than running it up the middle." Mazzone looked up and gave me the finger.