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Eating the Enemy: Washington

A more abstract discussion today.

I bet he'd look even cuter spit-roasted over a fire.
I bet he'd look even cuter spit-roasted over a fire.

From the Boise Weekly:

In the 2011 Idaho Fish and Game Big Game rule book, there is the following rule for big game meat: "Hunters are required to remove and care for the edible meat of big game animals, except black bears, mountain lions and gray wolves."

A hunter can literally just shoot and run with lions and wolves and bears (oh my).

That does help explain why I've never found a good recipe.

After repeated, unreturned calls to Idaho Fish and Game, I got the hint that "eating wolf" is not a topic that the department would like to go on record about.

Idaho is not the only area with wolf issues, pro or con. The Montana Sportsman for Fish and Wildlife group is taking aggressive moves to encourage wolf hunting. It is offering a $100 reward to sportsmen who send in photos of killed wolves. The president of the group, Keith Kubista, noted: "You have to encourage people to do it [wolf hunt]. ... You can't eat a wolf. There's no food value."

Finally a viable career path for all of our aspiring Photoshop artists out there. Maybe someone can make a meme out of Eli Manning looking at dead wolves (NSFW, by the way).

Recently, Jedi knight Liam Neeson made headlines for eating wolf in preparation for his survival film The Grey. According to an interview with Neeson in Outdoor Life:

"A few guys did upchuck. We all knew what we were eating. All I can say is, it was very gamey," explained Neeson.

But long before the hoopla about Neeson, there was the Seattle-area restaurant How to Cook a Wolf. To be clear, the name is not an homage to barbarism but the title of a book by famous food writer M.F.K. Fisher. But that's not to say that people haven't been confused by the name.

"We had one person repeatedly egg the restaurant every few months. We ended up setting up security cameras and caught him hammering in a window and egging the inside of the restaurant," said chef-owner Ethan Stowell. "When we caught him, we asked why he was doing the egging. He said 'Cuz you can't serve wolf.' We showed him the menu and explained that we have never served wolf. ... He cut us a check for the damages."

The lesson: people are stupid.

So I did some follow-up questions with chef Stowell. I was curious how he would cook a wolf.

"I would spit roast him over wood, nice and slow. Then I would pull the meat and serve it with roasted jalapenos, tomatillo salsa, fresh cilantro and tortillas. Oh, and a good beer," he said. "You can't eat dog without beer."

Tosh, you've been warned. Go Bears.