USC Punished by NCAA; Golden Bears Now The Undisputed 2004 Pac-10 Champions!

Bruce Feldman reports the hammer has come down on the Trojans.

USC has been hit with a two-year post-season ban in addition to the loss of scholarships, among other penalties from the NCAA.

Pretty important stuff for the future. But even bigger for Cal fans is what happens to the past.

•Public reprimand and censure.

•Four years of probation: from June 10, 2010, through June 9, 2014.

•Postseason ban for the 2009-10 men's basketball season. (self-imposed)

•Postseason ban for the 2010 and 2011 football seasons.

•One-year show-cause penalty for assistant football coach Todd McNair (June 10, 2010, to June 9, 2011).

•Vacation of all football wins, including football bowl games, from the 2004 and 2005 seasons.

•Vacation of all basketball wins in the 2007-08 season, including the NCAA tournament. (self-imposed)

•Vacation of all wins in women's tennis between November 2006 and May 2009.(self-imposed)

•Reduction of football scholarships by 10 for the next three academic years.

You know what this means right? TIME TO MAKE THOSE 10-0 2004 PAC-10 CHAMPIONS T-SHIRTS! TEDFORD HAS BROUGHT US TO PASADENA...SIX YEARS AGO! RETROACTIVE ROSE BOWL HERE WE COME!

"Baby steps." said Jeff Tedford. "We're thrilled at the opportunity to finally earn that trip for Pasadena. I'll be making the calls to Aaron, JJ, Geoff and the rest of the guys soon enough. We couldn't be happier at finally getting our chance to play in the Retroactive Rose Bowl against a very talented Michigan Wolverines squad. I feel so proud that our guys are finally getting the credit they deserve."

While there could be some dispute between Cal or Auburn being #2 and worthy of the 2004 BCS Retroactive National Championship in Miami, with only ten wins from that season, the Bears are happy to concede the title game to the insatiable Tigers fans to get their trip to Pasadena. Sandy Barbour made an official statement, "It figures that our first Rose Bowl team took another six years to play in Pasadena. We are thrilled at this unique opportunity."

Dave Brandon, Michigan's current athletic director, made an official statement, "Sure. I miss bowl games."

Aaron Rodgers is chomping at the bit. "Oh, we're going to come out with a fury. I've been saving my best game for the Rose Bowl. Michigan's gonna feel my six years of bottled-up frustration all coming out. I'm going to treat those corners like I treat Tony Kornheiser--total and utter contempt."

Lloyd Carr, quite content with retirement, was chased down in front of his lawn. "For God's sake people. I've been in retirement for three years. Leave me alone. Grumble grumble grumble."

Geoff McAarthur was already putting on the pads. "Let's do this. I still got this. Just enough time for my leg to recover. We're going to make Pasadena Bear Territory."

Chad Henne looked shocked, and then seemed to be terrified at the mere prospect upon hearing Rodgers's comment. "Umm...really? Is this really necessary? Can't we just settle this on that golf course next to the Rose Bowl? Aaron and I can swing the clubs, just the two of us? I think we can do that, right guys? Guys?"

J.J. Arrington beamed at a chance to relive his times with a good offensive line. "HAHA, YES! HAHAHA, YES! HAHAHAHAHA, YES! HAHAHAHAHAHA...."

Rich Rodriguez seemed relieved. "I'm so happy that I've finally got to lead Michigan to the promised land and a Big Ten title. Oh, wait, I've still done nothing? Well, I'm so happy that I get to coach the Wolverines. That should take off most of the pressure for me, right? Oh...um...should be a good game..."

Marshawn Lynch seemed oblivious to all statements. "Oh yeah man. I be running whereever. I'll be doing what I do, trucking some fools. Just gotta make sure I know which blue and yellow is mine, ya know?"

Mike Hart looked pained upon hearing the news. "Really? Why would you put me through facing that defense? Ahh man...I bleed maize and blue, but can't their offense just play against their defense? Like the best summer practice ever?"

Lorenzo Alexander lit up. "Well, I've gotten a lot better since then. So, yeah, sucks for the Wolves. I'm gonna be hunting them."

Braylon Edwards just scowled when approached and walked away without response.