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Meet The Schneider!

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On February 14, 2009, Tom Schneider was signing autographs on his photobook "Inside The Huddle" at that U-Threads store in Walnut Creek.  Inside The Huddle is a great photobook of the 2007 football season (not so great season, but great photos).

If you can’t find Inside the Huddle on Amazon, it should be available at these local vendors!  Bancroft Clothing * Cal Student Bookstore * Analog Books * Orinda Books * Orinda Country Club * UC Threads

So, anyway, I was excited to go make the 5 minute walk down there, buy a book, chat aimlessly with Tom Schneider about the inane inanities of our day, and then beg my wife to go see "Confessions Of A Shopaholic" with me.  But, when I got down to U-Threads, things got off on the wrong foot, I think, pretty quick.

Tom Schneider started to give me the spiel about his book and I noted that I had actually seen it before.  At FanFest.  Which is true.

This, of course, left unspoken the fact that, even though I had previously had an opportunity to purchase the book, I had not.  That's never a strong way to discuss somebody and their product.  But, at least, it was unspoken.

Until I said "Well, I actually didn't buy it, then.  It's not that I hate you.  Although, I do....."  I, then, trailed off. 

I'm not going to lie here, it was uncomfortable.  Sweat-inducingly so.  Yet, despite all this and despite the fact he had never heard of us and despite the fact that I told him I never played Division I football because I was "a tiny Jew" and despite the fact that my wife spent the entire session combing through the photobook to find more and more de-shirted Cal football players to ogle and despite the fact that consumer confidence is at a 35 year low and despite the fact that nobody seems to like 33SwisherSweet besides me and despite the fact that this is a wildly unfunny run-on sentence, Tom Schneider was still nice enough to agree to an interview. So, yay!

After he agreed, he asked how I wanted the book signed.  I half wanted him to sign the book

"Dear Twist;

I Declare You Sanchez

Nailed It, Tom.

PS Honk!"

Instead, I just asked for "To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything! Julie Newmar" as I do on all my autographed sports memorabilia.  Yknow, I didn't want anything to be extra weird.  Not after that whole "I hate you and everything you stand for" fiasco. 

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So, as long as he didn't give me a fake e-mail (a moderately distinct possibility after my performance that day), we can send him a bunch of questions to be answered.  So, fair CGB denizens, what questions should we ask Tommy Boy Schneider?  And, yes, Avinash already started this process, so let's not double up on questions he's already answered.