I've slowly come to a horrifying realization. The words that are coming out of my fingers are being mis-interpreted. When I write something like this:
Funny Joke Funny Joke Funny Joke Funny Joke Funny Joke Funny Joke
It actually comes out like this to you people:
When I sit down to write these things, I put a lot of thought into which kinds of dick jokes I am going to use. So, to find out that people are misinterpreting my expertly written witicisms, well, you can understand how frustrating it is.
So, my thought is this. If I were to flip the script on you, would that lead to hilarity? Does this come out funny:
Does that turn into a funny joke for you guys? Can I consider the script flipped? I need to know. I need to get throught that TnHBlock filter you have running. Or, as this might read to you now, blahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahPAINTRAIN!
Women's tennis goes to Moraga:
BERKELEY - The California women's tennis team heads over the hill to Moraga, Calif. for the St. Mary's Invitational at the Korth Tennis Complex this weekend, Oct. 10-12. The Golden Bears will play in their final individual tournament before the ITA Regional Championships. In addition to host St. Mary's, Cal will also face players from Stanford, Washington, Portland, Gonzaga, San Francisco, Santa Clara, UC Davis, Pacific, San Jose State, Boise State, Sacramento State and Nevada.
Selected Cal players will compete at the three-day invitational where play opens at 8:30 a.m. each day beginning on Friday, Oct. 10 and will include separate singles and doubles draws as well as a back-draw for eliminated players. Singles and doubles finals will take place on Sunday, Oct. 12.
Women's golf ties for fourth:
SAMMAMISH, Wash.- The 2008 University of California women's golf team finished tied for fourth in the Edean Ihlanfeldt Invitational Wednesday, Oct. 8 at the Sahalee Golf Club in Sammamish, Wash., with a 54-hole score of 927 (310, 308, 309 +63). The Bears finished behind tournament winner Stanford's +41 (303, 303, 299 - 905), second place Oregon's +57 (299, 309, 314 - 921) and third place Washington's +58 (310, 310, 302 - 922). Cal tied with Bay Area foe San Francisco (321, 298, 308 - 927, +63).
Men's swimming debuts against Pacific:
The California men's swimming team opens the 2008-09 season in a dual meet against Pacific on Saturday, Oct. 11, in Stockton, Calif. The Golden Bears divers will make their season debut in the Oct. 30 dual meet against Washington, as there will be no diving in the Pacific meet. Second-year Cal head coach David Durden has another talented squad, including Beijing Olympic gold-medalist Nathan Adrian, fellow 2008 Olympians Martti Aljand, Guy Barnea, Damir Dugonjic and Martin Liivamagi, and a large cast of All-Americans including David Russell, Sean Mahoney and Graeme Moore.
This will mark a homecoming for Cal first-year assistant coach Greg Meehan, who was previously the head coach of the Pacific swimming teams.
Women's swimming, too:
On the Pool Deck
The California women's swimming team opens its 2008-09 season in a dual meet against Pacific on Saturday, Oct. 11, in Stockton, Calif. The Golden Bears have plenty of talent and experience back in the pool this season, including 2008 All-Americans Madison Kennedy, Dana Vollmer, Lauren Rogers, Lauren Boyle, Alexandra Ellis, Tara Thomas, Hannah Wilson and Amanda Sims. Head coach Teri McKeever also has a solid blend of first-year athletes, including Olympic silver medalist Sara Isakovic. Cal opened last season against Pacific (in Berkeley) and triumphed by a score of 163-90. The Bears are 25-2 all-time against the Tigers.
Men's golf hangs out with some Chinese people:
BERKELEY - Ten of the top amateur/junior players from China comprising the Young Golf Heroes completed a six-day cultural exchange in the Bay Area with events hosted by the California men's golf program last weekend, winding up a trip that head coach Steve Desimone believes may be reciprocated in the future with a visit to Asia by the Golden Bears.
The Chinese delegation was welcomed Friday with a round of golf at the Mira Vista Golf & Country Club, with head-to-head competition that saw the Bears take the team title and sophomore Eric Mina come away with the lowest score of 69, followed by a ceremony and banquet. Saturday's events included another round of golf and camaraderie at Orinda Country Club, leaving both delegations grateful for the opportunity.
Okanes has practice report:
There were so many players wearing red jerseys at Wednesday’s practice, it almost looked like a Stanford practice. But fear not, there always is a sea of red during bye weeks as players get time off from practice to rest or heal up their bumps and bruises.
A red jersey means a practice non-participant, and there were a lot of those Wednesday night as many of the young players in the program wore pads and hit hard during live crossover drills. Coach Jeff Tedford said none of the players wearing red had anything significant and should return to full capacity when the team returns from its bye weekend on Sunday night.
Tedford did say something Wednesday that was somewhat notable, in a clarifying way. Immediately after Saturday’s game, he was asked if Nate Longshore would remain the starter for the next game. His answer? “Probably.” But he immediately followed that up by saying he didn’t know for sure and the evaluation is continual, which has been his watchword all season.
I interpreted that to mean Longshore would get first team reps but could be surpassed if Kevin Riley outplayed him in practice. But Tedford said Wednesday that the quarterbacks will continue to split the first team reps during practice next week.
Riley is cool. Under fire:
BERKELEY — Everyone seems to agree that Nate Longshore and Kevin Riley have handled their quarterback competition flawlessly. They even seem to be comparing notes on how to deal with a demotion.
In his first public comments since being replaced by Longshore as the starter, Riley sounded a lot like Longshore did when he lost the No. 1 job to Riley out of training camp.
"I'm just going to go out there and keep working every day and make the team better every day," Riley said several times during a interview after practice this week.
Now let's go back to the end of August, when Longshore addressed coach Jeff Tedford's decision to go with Riley as the starter.
"I'm just doing the same thing, focusing on getting better and improving, and focusing on doing whatever the team needs to win," Longshore said on several occasions.
Okanes has a chat today, btw, at 1. So, czech that out!
If you see any other Cal-related links. Or how our economy is, yknow, in shambles bring those bad boys on over. blahblahblahblahdumpaway! blahGOBEARS!