Thanks to Berkelium97 & TheScientist109 for transcribing. Group effort!
Bryce Treggs (BT): This is my man, McLovin right here.
Lindsay Brauner (LB): Oh my gosh, McLovin?
BT: McLovin from Superbad?
LB: Wait, which one?
* Jared Goff shakes head furiously *
BT: You don't rememeber McLovin?
LB: *to Ausin Hinder* I think he looks like McLovin.
Austin Hinder (AH): WHAT?
LB: He looks more like McLovin. Jared doesn't look like McLovin. Bryce, you don't look like anyone from that movie.
BT: Cuz I'm myself. I'm just Trigga-myself.
LB: Jared, do you think you look like McLovin?
Jared Goff (JG): * laughing * No!
BT: He sounds like McLovin.
LB: Austin, are you a McLovin-type?
AH: No. No, I am not the McLovin-type.
LB: Well, if you guys were characters-can you all scoot in a little bit? Like, just really cuddle up there.
*Hinder rests his head on Goff's shoulder*
LB: Awww... Is that what you guys do? Do you like to watch movies together? Is that where Superbad was coming from? Because you like to watch movies together.
* Goff nods enthusiastically *
*Hinder gives a surprised look *
LB: Aw, that's adorable!
(Ed: Most controversial statement ever!)
LB:If you guys were movie characters, which ones would you be?
BT: I would be the zebra in Madagascar.
JG: Hinder's the guy from Twilight.
LB: Oh, a little bit!
AH: The vampire?! * shrugs * I guess I'll take that.
BT: And then we got McLovin.
LB: He's not McLovin! I'm just not seeing it. So, we have Edward, I'm still not really sold on McLovin..
JG: Yeah, neither am I, but everyone else seems to be
LB: Maybe a little bit when you talk? Maybe a little bit of McLovin vocal intonation.
AH: Y'know, just because you look like McLovin doesn't mean you have to act like him. There's a big difference.
JG: I don't look like McLovin. I don't talk like McLovin. I don't act like McLovin. I am not McLovin.
BT: He is not embracing his character. You have to embrace your character.
AH: I embrace the vampire.
BT: Thank you.
LB: Well, think of a better one, Jared.
JG: You guys give me one because I can't think of one myself.
BT: McLovin? McLovin? McLovin. That's McLovin.
LB: He's resigned to McLovin.