FanPost

DBD 10.20.11. The long Zanesville nightmare is over.


The escape of 56 exotic animals from a farm in Zanesville, Ohio, Tuesday night caused a local panic and made national news.  Fortunately for the public, all animals are accounted for.  

An Ohio sheriff believes no more exotic animals are on the loose after his deputies killed 49 lions, tigers and other wild animals freed from a local farm by its suicidal owner.

Of the 56 animals released Tuesday night, only a grizzly bear, two monkeys and three leopards were taken alive, Muskingum County Sheriff Matt Lutz said.


One monkey remained unaccounted for Wednesday night, but conservationist Jack Hanna, who assisted in the effort, said the animal may have been eaten.


"It looks like everything is taken care of," Hanna said. "There was one monkey left, and right now, we found a carcass of the monkey. We don't know if it was eaten."


The farm's owner, Terry Thompson, pried open cages and opened the farm's fences before dying from a self-inflicted gunshot wound Tuesday afternoon, Lutz said.

So there you go.  It's all over.   And neither CALumbus Bear nor I were eaten.  I can say that about CALumbus Bear, notwithstanding the fact that I didn't hear from him yesterday, based on my confidence that the aforementioned monkey carcass is most likely not him.  

Hopefully, the next time anything "exotic" gets loose in Ohio, it will just be a bunch of exotic dancers.   That will not be as scary.  

Or, then again, maybe it would be.  

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via lorilenz.files.wordpress.com


The opinions expressed in a FanPost are, in every way, reflective of the opinions of every California Golden Blogs Marshawnthusiast. Moreover, they are reflective of every employee of SBNation, including Tyler "Blez" Bleszinski.

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