I'll be clear. I hate Duke. If you don't hate Duke, there's something wrong with you.
There's really no logical explanation for my hatred of Duke. It's pathological really. Maybe it's the smarmy Coach K, who's become famous for his profane ref tirades that NO ONE ever calls him out for. Or it's the fact that the so-called 'financially shackled coach' gets free advertising power with a bunch of commercial spots that somehow violate no NCAA regulations. Or that every other player that goes through the Duke program seems to replicate his coach's behavior and irredeemable douchery (Laettner, Wojo, Redick, Paulus, now Singler and Zoobird). Or that their Cameron Crazies are total toolbags (imagine if the Furd students actually cared about their sports team) and for some reason continue to be extolled as the standard to which all college fans should set themselves to.
Or that every other college basketball analyst (Seth Davis, Jay Williams, Jay Bilas, Mike Patrick, and the always exasperating Dickie V) is either a former Dukie or might as well be a Dukie schill. Or it's the same reason most people hate USC, the Lakers, the Yankees--they're always good, and their fans constantly remind us about the superiority of their program, whether it's good or not. Not that they know much of anything about basketball except they 'play the right way' or whatever the fuck that means.
But I'm guessing it mostly has to do with middle America's exasperating love for the DUKIES. That they have passionate fans, that they're a successful academic institution, that they get carte blanche exposure from the Worldwide leader. Why they are the paragon of the right way is beyond me, while it's okay to everyone else. It leads to me believe that not only does middle America suck, it seems to relish a form of basketball that's unwatchable and unsightly and rewards playing the refs rather than the game.
If you love America, root against Duke this weekend. It's your duty.
What teams, what people, what things do you loathe eternally and irrationally?
(Note: Let's avoid the obvious suspects like the generic Furd, USC and UCLA. Casey Jacobsen though, it's all yours.)