Yes, I know exactly what you are saying.  What?  Another serious number-crunching, statistically-minded post from the California Golden Blogs?  When are they going to take things a bit more lightly?  Why always so serious?

Well, I apologize.  I'm sorry that yet again we've dispensed with the inane to bring you the hard-hitting internet journalissimo that you've come to expect from the California Golden Blogs.  I mean, as I always say, we are dealing with two of the most important, most sacrosanct entities out there:  college football and the internet.

Neither are laughing matters! 

So, if you want a few laughs, a few chuckles, a few guffaws, like usual, perhaps this isn't the blog for you.  Well, except for this joke here:

A tree walks into a bar.  The bartender, upset, asks it to leaf.

Were I knowledgeable about the sound one makes when enjoying a mirthful situation, I would make it here now.  I would make it out loud.  And were there an internet acronym for experiencing a mirthful situation audibly and loudly, I would use it. 

Failing that, let's just look at the season stats for the 2008 Cal football team.  With signing day tomorrow, we have 2009 on the horizon.  Time to close the books on 2008!

All stats are from here

             2008 California Football
                CAL Overall Team Statistics (as of Dec 27, 2008)
                                   All games

TEAM STATISTICS                         CAL          OPP
--------------------------------------------------------
SCORING.......................          424          259
  Points Per Game.............         32.6         19.9
FIRST DOWNS...................          230          229
  Rushing.....................           97           95
  Passing.....................          110          115
  Penalty.....................           23           19
RUSHING YARDAGE...............         2421         1589
  Yards gained rushing........         2786         2056
  Yards lost rushing..........          365          467
  Rushing Attempts............          435          495
  Average Per Rush............          5.6          3.2
  Average Per Game............        186.2        122.2
  TDs Rushing.................           22           16
PASSING YARDAGE...............         2467         2509
  Att-Comp-Int................   397-209-10   432-223-24
  Average Per Pass............          6.2          5.8
  Average Per Catch...........         11.8         11.3
  Average Per Game............        189.8        193.0
  TDs Passing.................           25           12
TOTAL OFFENSE.................         4888         4098
  Total Plays.................          832          927
  Average Per Play............          5.9          4.4
  Average Per Game............        376.0        315.2
KICK RETURNS: #-Yards.........       43-877      66-1352
PUNT RETURNS: #-Yards.........       38-448       23-284
INT RETURNS: #-Yards..........       24-419       10-184
KICK RETURN AVERAGE...........         20.4         20.5
PUNT RETURN AVERAGE...........         11.8         12.3
INT RETURN AVERAGE............         17.5         18.4
FUMBLES-LOST..................         16-9        28-10
PENALTIES-Yards...............       77-649       75-647
  Average Per Game............         49.9         49.8
PUNTS-Yards...................      74-3087      79-3190
  Average Per Punt............         41.7         40.4
  Net punt average............         36.0         33.2
TIME OF POSSESSION/Game.......        29:06        30:47
3RD-DOWN Conversions..........       47/159       61/197
  3rd-Down Pct................          30%          31%
4TH-DOWN Conversions..........         5/14         7/22
  4th-Down Pct................          36%          32%
SACKS BY-Yards................       35-270       25-183
MISC YARDS....................           75            4
TOUCHDOWNS SCORED.............           54           33
FIELD GOALS-ATTEMPTS..........        15-21        10-17
ON-SIDE KICKS.................          0-6          2-6
RED-ZONE SCORES...............   84-102 82%    60-88 68%
RED-ZONE TOUCHDOWNS...........   60-102 59%    42-88 48%
PAT-ATTEMPTS..................   53-53 100%    31-32 97%
ATTENDANCE....................       862874       520594
  Games/Avg Per Game..........     14/61634     10/52059
  Neutral Site Games..........                   2/42268

SCORE BY QUARTERS     1st  2nd  3rd  4th    Total
--------------------  ---  ---  ---  ---      ---
CAL.................  108  124   81  111  -   424
Opponents...........   40   65   86   68  -   259

First thing of note.  First downs.

FIRST DOWNS...................          230          229

We average about 13 more points a game, but only had 1 more first down the entire year than our opponents?!?!?!?  Well, what does that mean?  Either we were scoring explosively or our D was bending, but not breaking.  Or both!  Methinks, its a little from column A, a little from column B.  Even with all of our offensive woes, we had a strangely explosive offense.  One Best run here.  One Vereen run there.  Then, our D would come in with Bob Gregory's classic Bend, But Don't Break.  That makes sense when you think about it, but seeing it in black and white was interesting.

More indication of that interesting situation:

TIME OF POSSESSION/Game.......        29:06        30:47

Sort of speaks for itself there.  Strangely explosive, yet at times mediocre offense with a staunch bend, but don't break D.

Two more notes.  One, we actually gave up more yards through the air than we had.  Considering our staunch D, especially aerially, for most of the year (save a few games like MSU and Arizona), this reflects poorly upon the passing offense.

Also, we only had 3ish more yards of air attack than ground attack per game.  Another sign of a great rush attack and a not so good air attack.

RUSHING         GP  Att Gain Loss  Net   Avg  TD Long Avg/G
-----------------------------------------------------------
Best, Jahvid    12  194 1653   73 1580   8.1  15   86 131.7
Vereen, Shane   13  142  754   39  715   5.0   4   81  55.0
Slocum, Tracy   11   22  132    7  125   5.7   1   24  11.4
Ross, Jeremy    13   10   72   10   62   6.2   0   41   4.8
Geurts, Peter    3    7   48    1   47   6.7   0   27  15.7
Ta'ufo'ou, Will 13    4   26    0   26   6.5   0   21   2.0
Mansion, Brock   2    3   13    0   13   4.3   1    7   6.5
Young, Sean     10    1    2    0    2   2.0   0    2   0.2
Boateng, Nyan   13    1    0    0    0   0.0   0    0   0.0
Tyndall, John   11    1    0    1   -1  -1.0   0    0  -0.1
WILLIAMS, W.    13    1    0    2   -2  -2.0   0    0  -0.2
TEAM            12   11    0   24  -24  -2.2   0    0  -2.0
Riley, Kevin    11   30   86  142  -56  -1.9   1   27  -5.1
Longshore, Nate 13    8    0   66  -66  -8.2   0    0  -5.1
Total.......... 13  435 2786  365 2421   5.6  22   86 186.2
Opponents...... 13  495 2056  467 1589   3.2  16   59 122.2

What do we take away from here?  Jahvid Best is good.  I mean really good.  I am sort of stunned at the low average that Vereen had.  Only 55 yards a game?  I could have sworn he would have more.  Especially considering he started the ASU game when Best was out.  He only had 50 fewer carries than Best.  And he has a lower average rush per game than Slocum.  This is not to speak ill of Vereen, he is clearly a great back.  And Slocum is talented.  And comparing Vereen to Best is not fair, considering how amazing Best is.

I could see Slocum transferring.  He is clearly very talented.  He has 2 stud backs ahead of him.  He has a lot of talent coming up behind him, like Deboskie and Yarnway.  Montgomery saw the same situation and gtfo'd.  Could Slocum do the same?

PASSING         GP   Effic Cmp-Att-Int   Pct  Yds  TD Lng Avg/G
---------------------------------------------------------------
Riley, Kevin    11  117.85  112-221-6   50.7 1360  14  59 123.6
Longshore, Nate 13  125.78  93-164-4    56.7 1051  10  74  80.8
Mansion, Brock   2   86.40    3-6-0     50.0   26   0  10  13.0
TEAM            12    0.00    0-4-0      0.0    0   0   0   0.0
Vereen, Shane   13    0.00    0-1-0      0.0    0   0   0   0.0
Ross, Jeremy    13  682.00    1-1-0    100.0   30   1  30   2.3
Total.......... 13  120.59 209-397-10   52.6 2467  25  74 189.8
Opponents...... 13   98.46 223-432-24   51.6 2509  12  63 193.0

I was excited to see the stats here, until I actually saw the stats here.  I mean this is the big thing, right?  Nate v. Kevin!  Kevin v. Nate!  How much money, how much time, has been spent on this.  And, looking at the numbers, Jeremy Ross should be the QB!  Efficiency rating of 682.  Now, that is impressive!

Learn more about the efficiency rating here.    Here is the list of the Top 100 QBs by rating.

Kevin Riley is 79th behind Chris Turner at Maryland.  Longshore is not listed, oddly.  It says you have to have played in 75% of games with minimum of 15 snaps per game.  I feel like he did that, but perhaps not?  His 125 rating would put him at 60th right behind Riley Skinner of Wake Forest and before the QB at Akron!  Akron!  These aren't exactly luminaries of the QB world. 

If I had to choose who was better, its tough.  Riley had more opportunities, so he racked up more counting stats.  But his completion percentage is 7% worse.  Ai!  His average yards per game is better, tho, by a healthy margin.  So, there are conflicting numbers all over the place.

Long story short, I think it's safe to say that Cal didn't obtain the QB play that it would have liked.  Perhaps some of it stems from youth and inexperience at WR.  But not ALL of it can be attributed to that.  Some of the blame has to fall squarely on the shoulders of Nate and Kevin.  Hopefully, the QB next year (most likely Riley) will improve.  Honestly, it'd be tough not to.

RECEIVING       GP  No.  Yds   Avg  TD Long Avg/G
-------------------------------------------------
Boateng, Nyan   13   29  439  15.1   5   53  33.8
Morrah, Cameron 13   27  326  12.1   8   50  25.1
Best, Jahvid    12   27  246   9.1   1   42  20.5
Vereen, Shane   13   27  221   8.2   1   59  17.0
Tucker, Verran  10   21  362  17.2   3   74  36.2
CUNNINGHAM, L.  13   18  276  15.3   1   35  21.2
Ross, Jeremy    13   17  210  12.4   2   29  16.2
Young, Sean     10   17  192  11.3   1   42  19.2
Calvin, Michael  4    8  103  12.9   0   23  25.8
Ta'ufo'ou, Will 13    7   27   3.9   1    5   2.1
Smith, Tad      12    3   23   7.7   1    9   1.9
Slocum, Tracy   11    2    0   0.0   0    2   0.0
Smith, Zach      9    1   10  10.0   0   10   1.1
Glover, Drew     2    1    9   9.0   0    9   4.5
Jones, Marvin    5    1    8   8.0   0    8   1.6
Stroud, Alex     1    1    7   7.0   0    7   7.0
Riley, Kevin    11    1    6   6.0   0    6   0.5
Miller, Anthony 10    1    2   2.0   1    2   0.2
Total.......... 13  209 2467  11.8  25   74 189.8
Opponents...... 13  223 2509  11.3  12   63 193.0

Anthony Miller.  1 Reception.  2 yards.  1 TD.  Nice!

But besides that delightful footnote, you know it's not promising when 3 out of the top 4 receivers are not wide.  Morrah, a TE, and the RB double headed attack are 2,3, and 4.  Only Boateng is ahead of them.  And he averaged 15 yards a game.  Our #1 receiver averaged 33 yards a game.  Tucker did average 4 more a game, but he came on later in the year, so his overall year stats are not as strong.  There really isn't a lot to say here, the numbers (or lack thereof) speak for themselves.  And, are not, in any way surprising.

I am going to discuss the Defensive players here, because the D tables sometimes create odd situations for the text below them.  Not sure why.

The top guys are about what you'd expect for tackles.  3 LBs.  That's solid.  In 2007, our top tackler was DeCoud, a S.  Not as good.  I am a bit surprised at how far down Worrell Williams is, but there were a lot of great players playing around him.  Gobbling up tackles and the ilk. 

BTW, check out Pain Trains numbers.  23 TFLs!  As a linebacker. And 10.5 sacks.  He had more sacks than Jordan and Alualu combined.  Crazzy!  Thats about 240 lost yards from Pain Train alone!  Speaking of cartoonish numbers, SydGOD only had 4 interceptions on the year (tough to pick a ball when nobody is throwing to you), but had 128 yars on those 4 ints.  And 14 pass break ups.  He'd always seem to get a hand in on the last second there.

Some great numbers down there.  Hopefully, things won't drop off too much next year.  What numbers intrigue and interest you?  Tell us below!  And Go Bears!

             |--------Tackles--------| |-Sacks-| |---Pass Def---| |-Fumbles-| Blkd
DEFENSIVE LEADERS   GP Solo  Ast Total   TFL/Yds   No-Yds  Int-Yds BrUp QBH Rcv-Yds  FF Kick Saf
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
7  Felder, Anthony  13   37   56    93   5.5-14   0.5-3      1-15     1   2    .      1    .   .
56 Follett, Zack    13   58   29    87  23.0-138 10.5-99      .       4   4   1-0     5    .   .
18 MOHAMED, M.      13   51   36    87   6.0-22   3.0-16     3-30     2   3   2-3     1    .   .
5  THOMPSON, S.     13   41   29    70   7.5-26   2.0-17     4-128   14   .    .      .    .   .
29 Ezeff, Marcus    13   36   30    66   1.0-1       .       3-78     6   .   1-0     .    .   .
1  WILLIAMS, W.     13   25   39    64   5.0-20   1.0-10     1-50     6   .   1-0     .    .   .
44 Alualu, Tyson    13   21   41    62  11.0-66   6.0-51      .       2   6    .      2    .   .
26 Hagan, Darian    13   38   18    56   2.5-4       .       3-12    15   .   1-0     1    .   .
97 Jordan, Cameron  12   26   21    47  11.0-29   4.0-17     1-3      .   2   2-7     1    .   .
25 Johnson, Brett   12   25   18    43      .        .       2-62     3   .    .      1    1   .
9  Young, Eddie     12   18   22    40   1.5-4    0.5-3      1-17     .   .    .      1    .   .
76 Hill, Derrick    13    4   25    29   2.5-4    0.5-1       .       1   .    .      .    .   .
17 Conte, Chris     12   15   13    28   1.0-5       .       1-0      7   .    .      .    .   .
2  Hicks, Bernard    6   14    9    23      .        .       1-0      1   .    .      .    .   .
94 Davis, Rulon      9    8   11    19   5.5-33   4.0-28      .       2   3    .      2    1   .
30 KENDRICKS. M.    13    8    7    15   1.0-10   1.0-10      .       .   .    .      .    1   .
98 Kane, Mika       13    4   10    14   0.5-1       .        .       .   .    .      .    .   .
0C Holt, D.J.       12    9    5    14   1.0-1       .        .       .   .    .      .    .   .