How to fix Cal's offensive line

Yesterday sucked. I think it is a generally accepted fact that everyone involved with the Cal football program should be fired. Except for the flat top concession guy. He can stay.

The primary problem with our offense was our atrocious offensive line. This whole Marshall thing ain't working out, quotability be damned. When Cal looked at Marshall's reference page on his resume, they probably should have noticed that all his references were D-lineman.

However, I come not to complain. I come with solutions. I have our next offensive line coach, and we don't even need to go off campus to get him. That's right, Harper motherfucking Kamp.

via www3.pictures.gi.zimbio.com

Somehow, I could not find a photo of him setting a screen, but if you have watched any Cal basketball game over the past 2 years you have about 450 mental references.

If there is anyone who knows how to block offensively, it is Harper Kamp. In the photo above, he is so excited that he is even blocking his own teammate. That kind of fervor will transfer well to our offensive line.

Here are some of the benefits he will bring as Cal's offensive line coach: his ability to do non-moving screens will lead to reduced false start penalties, his revolutionary 'no-arms' approach will make Cal a hot location for top offensive line recruits, and his ability to play through injury will inspire our fragile O-Line.

For all these reasons and many, many more, I believe that Harper Kamp should replace Marshall as the offensive line coach for the Golden Bears football team.