As I recently determined, renaming the “moderator” position from Tyrannical King of UC Eugene to Overthrown Despot does not actually change my powers. I still am as powerful as ever. In fact, I just warned both JShufelt AND JTLight, two of the most powerful people in all of CGB North. “Never overthrow me again” I told them.

And if they want to maintain their power on the puppet government that I still control from exile, they should heed that warning!

sheeiiit, we might even be getting the next Jonathan Stewart. No really.

The mayor of Portland apologized Tuesday for lying about a sexual relationship with a male teenager he was mentoring three years ago, but asked the city to consider it an anomaly in two decades of public service.

Portland Mayor Tosses Male Teen’s Salad, Wants to Walk

We still have a lot to teach our new vassals up north. I received this “warning” today when I went to enter CGB North:

"You have been issued a warning.

You been totals overthrowed!

In order to continue participating on Addicted To Quack you must acknowledge your warning by pressing the OK button below."

Totals overthrowed. That sounds like something Kevin Riley would do, if he was totes a retard.

Worst “total overthrowed” of all time, I have now become the kindly old “Retired Founder” and AddictedToQuack himself is the “Overthrown Despot.”

this is exactly like an episode of 24, except way different.

Lets get one thing straight:

CGB = USA
ATQ = Canada

Even if you wanted to be, you are no threat to us. You are pathetic and I really must laugh…

With only six weeks left in the season, Taylor Harrison probably won’t play this season. His career might be over permanently.

Randle’s ankle has been doing well in practice.

ESPN’s bracketologist predicts Cal as a 4 seed this week. Other Pac-10 teams include ASU (5), UCLA (5), and U-Dub (10)

I received an email from our lovely secretary yesterday:

I received a phone call today from a mother whose son is in AP Chemistry at Berkeley High. She will pay someone to help her son with his Chemistry. She says he has a test on Thursday, so if you are interested please call her right away. Her name is Tyra and her number is ###-####.

I was thinking this would be fun to send:

Dear Tyra,

Thanks for the interest, but I’m sorry not even Jesus in a Labcoat can save your son’s ass two days before an AP exam. You should have found his weed stash last week, then we could help. Your $15/h pay just isn’t worth it. Multiply that shit by 100 and then we’ll talk.

Best,
carp

It was only three paragraphs – Stanford athletics is facing a decline (the folks call it a shortfall but let’s all agree on English today, shall we?) of up to $5 million in expected revenue over the next three seasons, and anything from staff to sport reductions is possible.

Meanwhile, Jim Harbaugh’s contract extension and salary bumps cool in his agent’s briefcase while he waits for cherubim and seraphim to sing “Do the deal, will ya’?” in his ear.

These two developments are linked not by the possibility that Stanford would pull the deal, or that it would discontinue football, but by this more enduring truth: Stanford football isn’t pulling its own weight, let alone anyone else’s.

The wins and losses speak for themselves. Nine wins over the Harbaugh Era, 25 in the past seven years. That’s out of 24 and 80 games, respectively.

Ratto

Select the All-Century team:

As part of the celebration of the 100th season of California men’s basketball in 2008-09, the Cal Athletic Department is asking for fan input to select the Golden Bears’ All-Century team. A total of 30 players will be chosen for the squad, which will be unveiled during Cal’s final home weekend Feb. 26-28.

Players who earned All-America honors (1st team, 2nd team or 3rd team) or Conference Player of the Year recognition – a total of 19 – receive an automatic berth on the All-Century team, and fans will determine the final 11. Each fan will be permitted to vote one time and voting will conclude on Monday, Feb. 23.

To vote, fans can select the All-Century team link at CalBears.com.

The list of nominees stretches back through every decade to the 1920s, when the first Golden Bears earned All-America honors, through the present day. Fans are also welcome to submit write-in candidates for the All-Century team.

JAMFEST 09!

Jammin’ Music • Contests & Prizes • Team Posters
Giveaways • Bounce Houses
Pop-a-Shot Game • Tons of Cal Gear
Video board shout-outs • Souvenirs • Cal Band
Food & Drink • And…
Youth teams and cheer groups are urged to wear their uniforms and gear. Show up and show off.

Jammin’ music, you say?

Cal bball tot ake on Oregons:

Looking to get back in the win column after having its nine-game winning streak snapped last Saturday, California (15-3, 4-1) returns home to face Oregon State on Thursday, Jan. 22, at 7:30 p.m. and Oregon on Saturday, Jan. 24, at 3 p.m. The Golden Bears suffered their first conference loss of the season at Stanford last Saturday, falling by the score of 75-69. Despite the loss, Cal remains tied for first place in the Pac-10 Conference.

Jamal Boykin recorded a career-high 22 points against Stanford, adding seven rebounds and four assists. The four assists also tied a personal best for Boykin.

Jerome Randle continues to pace the squad with 18.7 ppg and has been the Bears’ leading scorer in 12 of 18 games. He is dishing out 5.0 apg and owns a team-best 15 steals. Against the Cardinal, Randle secured his 300th assist, part of the seven that he had in the contest. He is just nine assists away from 10th all-time in school history. Randle is also getting close to 1,000 career points, currently standing at 915. Patrick Christopher may get there sooner as his current career point total is 959. They would be the 37th and 38th players in school history to reach 1,000 points.

Christopher cooled off a bit against the Cardinal, collecting nine points, but before that had posted four consecutive 20-point performances and led the Bears in scoring in three of them. He tallied a career-best 27 points and tied his career high in rebounds (11) against Washington on Jan. 10. Christopher is currently averaging 15.7 ppg, which is second best among the Bears.

Track starting up:

The California Golden Bears open the track and field season on Saturday, Jan. 24, in New Mexico’s inaugural Cherry & Silver Invitational indoor meet at the Albuquerque Convention Center in Albuquerque. Each of the competing teams except for New Mexico State, whose women are entered, will bring men’s and women’s teams to the Lobos’ meet: Cal, Adams State (Division II), Arizona, Arizona State, BYU, New Mexico, Northern Arizona and Stanford.

The Bears’ sprinters, jumpers, hurdlers and throwers will use the opening indoor meet to “break the ice,” Cal head coach Tony Sandoval said. “There’s a group of people who are really excited to compete, and we want to see where we’re at.”

Sandoval has a roster brimming with talent, including Bears who earned top accolades in 2008: NCAA pole-vault champion Katie Morgan, Pac-10 and MPSF high-jump champion Ed Wright, whose indoor season will close out his Cal career, Pac-10 100-meter hurdles champion Kimyon Broom and Croatian Olympian Martin Maric, who competed in Beijing last summer.

Softball getting national pub:

BERKELEY – The California softball team earned a No. 13 preseason ranking by ESPNU and a No. 17 ranking in the USA Today/NFCA Top 25 poll released on Tuesday.

ESPNU’s college contributing writer Graham Hayes, who ranked the Golden Bears No. 13, noted, “California has been to a World Series more times in recent years than the New York Yankees, so it’s not as if the 2002 national champion and one-time Oklahoma City regular is in a sad state of affairs. But after stumbling off the pace in the Pac-10 recently, the Bears may be back in top form in 2009.” Read full ESPNU post here

Cal, who returns six starters (Sanoe Kekahuna, Valerie Arioto, Vernae Sevilla, Taylor Kelly, Gina Leomiti and Bernice Masaniai) along with pitchers Marissa Drewrey, Arioto and Brittany LaRosa, finished the 2008 season with a 43-27 mark, a trip to the NCAA Super Regional and No. 14 ranking in the final USA Softball/ESPN.com Top 25 poll (No. 16 in the final USA Today/NFCA poll).

The Bears were paced by Arioto, who led the team in batting average (.324), runs (55), hits (71) and doubles (17) to earn All-Pac-10 and All-Pacific Region honors. Drewrey won 29 games in the circle with over 300 strikeouts en route to all-conference and all-region accolades. Cal set a team record with 279 RBI as well.

BBall to go to CGB North:

For just the second time since joining the Pac-10 in 1986, the California Golden Bears (5-0 Pac-10, 14-2) have started the season with a 5-0 mark in conference play. Overall, the Bears have now started conference play 5-0 or better five times in program history, but they have only gone 6-0 or better twice, in 1981-82 when they went 8-0 to begin their NorCal Conference play as well as last season’s 8-0 Pac-10 start. The Bears take a six-game winning streak to Oregon, the longest active streak in the conference. This is the second-longest winning streak of the season for the Bears who won seven games to being this season.

Cal moved back into the top-10 in the AP poll, coming in at No. 8 this week. Cal has been ranked in the top-10 in the /USA Today/ ESPN Coaches’ poll all season, this week moving up to No. 6. They have been ranked in the top-10 in at least one of the two polls in 22 of the last 23 rankings.

The Bears are in sole possession of first place in the Pac-10, a game up on the Stanford Cardinal (14-3, 4-1 Pac-10) and two games up on Oregon (7-9, 4-2 Pac-10) and Arizona State (12-6, 4-2 Pac-10).

Cal gymnast wins award:

BERKELEY – California freshman men’s gymnast Glen Ishino was named the Mountain Pacific Sports Federation Gymnast of the Week for Jan. 20, it was announced Tuesday by the conference office. Freshman Glen Ishino won the all-around in his first collegiate meet to help the No. 5 California men’s gymnastics team upset No. 1 Stanford, 342.200-338.400, on Feb. 16 at Haas Pavilion.

Ishino took first in the all-around with a 86.200, which was 0.600 ahead of the second-place finisher. The Santa Ana, Calif., native won pommel horse (15.400) almost a full point ahead of his closest competitor. He was second on parallel bars, missing the tie for first-place with teammate Kyson Bunthuwong by 0.100 points.

Cal football getting pub:

BERKELEY – Although the 2008 football season concluded less than a month ago, California is getting plenty of attention for its prospects in 2009. After completing the year with a 9-4 overall record, which included a 24-17 victory over Miami in the Emerald Bowl, Cal is receiving consistent Top 20 mention for next fall’s campaign.

The highest preseason ranking to date comes from rivals.com, which pegs the Bears 12th in the country. CBS Sportsline puts Cal at 17th, while both espn.com and sportsillustrated.com have the Bears in the 20th spot.

College Football News has tabbed tailback Jahvid Best as the top returning running back and fifth-best returning player in the country, while cornerback Syd’Quan Thompson rates seventh at his position and 73rd overall.

here, but bring me links from Chron and CoCoTimes for this DBD. Also, the head of seattle quacker.

We’re not your average rubber duckies…

Cal’s at # 44 for ESPN’s Prestige Rankings…just ahead of Stanfurd but behind Utah:

http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/news/story?id=3842161

umm…are people working today, or now that we have a democratic president we’ll just all go on unemployment? and be “working” I mean participating in the DBD.

This post has ONLY been flagged 3 times?!?!??! Come on guys….

can we get a summary of the Ryan Davis video?

http://cal.rivals.com/barrier_noentry.asp?ReturnTo=&sid=&script=content.asp&cid=902873&fid=&tid=&mid=&rid=

I really love Regina Carter, the jazz violinist. I went to see her at Yoshi’s previously, shes really amazing. Im LOVING her version of the Spartacus Love Song. I cant find it on youtube, but its so sick. Yusuf Lateef does a great version of that song, too.

This Spartacus Love song is so amazing.

Some serious (well, not really) trash talk between the mayor of Sactown and the President.

KJ really drops his trash talk thunder on the Baller-in-Chief. “Do not challenge me to a basketball game. That would be your first mistake as President of the United States of America,” Johnson warns Obama through a CBS13.com reporter. “Because even though I’m retired, I’ve still got a little game in me. […] I will skunk him if I need to.”

Video snippet if you click on the link above.

Norm Chow trying to re-woo Hasiak. This guy must be worth it.

A few more flaggings. These are anonymous, of course.

Flagged for treason of grand proportions. I’m going to tell the Department of Homeland Security that AtQ knows the location of Osama bin Laden and they they continually make terrorist threats against the innocent BruinsNation.

flagged not because Hydro said to, but because I do mind, the Dude minds. This will not stand, ya know, this aggression will not stand, man.

BTW, I think now that we control AtQ, we should utilize them as infantrymen in our next imperial conquest. Let them suffer from the front line casualties, while we dine in back.

Moreover, let’s discuss who we should colonize next.

Pac-10 Five Years in Advance

3. California: As long as the Bears hang on to Jeff Tedford, they’re going to win. Question is, can they? Given the school’s foot dragging on facilities, and the annual road block to a championship that is USC, there is a sense that someday Tedford will get fed up and find a place where he can really thrive. The Big Ten perhaps? Ohio State and Michigan are nowhere near the obstacle that the Trojans present. We rate California behind Oregon simply because of the Tedford-could-leave factor.

I don’t see him leaving if things go smoothly with the SAHPC. He’s right, the Trojans are the biggest “God, I wish we could beat them” team in America.

This is sad…kid gunned down on his porch in Danville…

Cal alum Jeff Kent to retire

made a few folks shake their head with his “You people in the Bay Area baffle me” comments

Think about it…Harbaugh eventually leaves (“dream job” my ass)…the 6 fans get upset…Bowlsby hires the O-line coach from UC Davis…‘furd keeps losing…and by 2018 there’s no more ’furd football.

I just got my Sport Illustrated today, and low and behold I find some Emerald Bowl news! On an article about Mayors betting on sports games, we get this little gem. (Excerpt below, doesn’t seem to be online, but here’s a link to prove it happened.

Before the Emerald Bowl, Miami mayor Manny Diaz promises San Francisco’s Gavin Newsom several bags of Florida oranges if the Hurricanes lose to Cal. The Bears win, but Newsom is denied his jolt of vitamin C: It’s illegal to ship Florida oranges to California (to keep a citrus canker that often attacks Sunshine State crops from spreading west). Diaz pays with stone crab claws instead. “We assumed they knew what regulations their state had,” his spokesperson said. “And we expected to win anyways.”